Sunday, December 12, 2004


Christmas season is in the air, so they say. Everyone's busy buying gifts, designing their houses with all sorts of Christmas decorations and busy preparing on what food to put on their table. How come I can't feel it? How come the day becomes closer the lonelier I get. How come I am not the feeling the Chrismas spirit?

One great factor that makes me no longer looking forward to Christmas day this season is the fact that I can't be with my family during the said day. That day would be the 1st day that I can't be with them. I can't help to think what's the reason why I am letting this to happen. I just can't believe that I am letting this to happen. I've been feeling low for quite some time now. I don't want to discuss the said day anymore.

When everyone else's celebrating Christmas, those of us who are working in call centers would be taking calls. Patiently assisting customers who have been having trouble with their internet connections or the like. We will be giving them our services in exchange of the salary that we would be getting from assisting them. As much as I'd like to think otherwise, I feel sorry for all of us. Leaving our family behind on this "Special Day" serving customers that we don't know miles and miles away. Yes, even if most of the times they are ungrateful. This is the scenario. This is the reason why I feel so lonely - isolated.

When our team leader gave us our schedule for the week that Christmas day falls, it was already too late for me to by my two-way ticket home because all the trips have been filled up. My day offs would be on the 23rd and 24th of December and that days would be enough for me to celebrate Christmas with my family. The sad thing is that it was all too late. Should I had known the schedule earlier, I would be able to buy tickets - to be with my family on Christ's birthday. It was too late.

Christmas is on the air. I wish I could feel it. I wish I could just breath it even for a day. As much as I'd like to keep these teardrops from falling I just can't. So I let them flow from my eyes until it drops to the earth and be forever lost.

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