Tuesday, April 05, 2005

So how's the weather?

I finally decided to go to Baguio for the 5 month apprenticeship program. Before I went to the terminal I visited first a friend of mine and we talked for a while then he accompanied me to the bus terminal. I even send SMS to some of my friends and most of them replied sending their regards and goodluck wishes. Oh by the way, I even dropped by my former office, but the guard won't allow me to bid my teamates goodbye. Sigh. I was so sad as I am not ready to leave all the people that became my family who supported me and who are always there for me through ups and downs. And I do appreciate them for that.

I arrived at Baguio about 11am in the morning. I send an SMS to a friend of mine asking him what's the address of the inn that he stayed when he first went to the city. Then I rode a cab to send me to the said inn. I am not excited nor delighted to go to Baguio that's why I felt so alone. Unlike my first trips to other places which I am so ecstatic to explore. This time it's different. It's as if I am being punish for sins that I am not even aware of. Most of my friends, who communicated with me through SMS, e-mails and blogs, told me that it's alright and in couple of days I won't feel that sad anymore. Sana nga.

I tried to take a nap for a while because I'm so tired from the travel. When I woke I still felt so alone and so small so I decided to take a walk. It was so cold outside and all you can see are unfamiliar faces busying themselves with things they do. I tried so hard to smile but it seems that it was so hard. I continued walking through the Session Road still looking at all the busy people hurrying here and there. Then I took Mabini Street to take me to the Burnham Park. Still I didn't feel alright so I decided to go back to the inn.

By the entrance I saw a ledge where I can sit on so I just sitted there feeling the cold wind brushed through my face reminding me that I am no longer in Manila. That I am in a new place all by myself. I tried to think of some of the happy moments that I have had. The Komikero meetings, the so-called mall tours with my Convergys and College friends, the secret dates and stolen moments, the jokes out of thin air, the bar hopping with strangers, the free drinks and all that. Those were the days. Then I noticed that I'm smiling. Somehow the loneliness seemed to fade away for a moment. Then I'm back to reality. I'm back to being sad.

Then Andy texted me and he arrived a minute later. We went to SM Baguio to let time fly by. Then we bid goodbye and I'm back to the inn by myself. I texted some of my friends and some replied. I am very much thankful to those who replied. And I do appreciate Philip (15 mins) and Mike's (55 mins) effort to call me and talked to me over the phone just to say hi and make sure that I'm OK. Then by 2am I tried to sleep to prepare myself for the next day.

No comments: